1-9-01~~afternoon
"playing by heart"

so here's the deal. this one is going to be strange...kinda like ellen's great one...but only in abby talk. go figure...i distort everything to fit my way. ha.

so here i am...i'm short...and i love.

i love to love and i love to be loved.

i love right now...but i can't have, so i hurt.

and i hurt so easily, but forgive too easily.

my life is so easy, no wait, it's really hard.

i cry everyday, i hide these tears.

i like to think i'm normal, yet i know there's no such thing.

i am loved by friends, but i just want my other half.

i miss my daddy.

i love him so much it almost makes me cry.

i have so much hate in my that i show it with love.

i am too selfish, and i really don't like myself.

no self esteem, no self confidence, not very much pride.

but i'm getting by...and i'm going on.

i'm getting by with what i have and i have too much.

sometimes i cry for no reason, then i smile like nothing was wrong. and i'm getting by. always just getting by, trying to live, trying to understand, only wanting love. real love.

don't be an angry ball. just trust me. you need to see it. keenan is gorgeous, trent is sexy, gracie is a bitch, and joan, well, joan is the epitome of my soul...what i want to be. free, and happy and careless. just trust me.

i love often, always too much, too soon...and i get hurt. i'm human, i'm 19, and well, what can i say? i'm an insecure girl...life goes on.

abby

quote:

Meredith: I'm not good at passion.

Trent: Is is because you're not good at losing control? You're better at giving direction?

M: Painfully obvious isn't it?

T: Painfully. But you know what? I take direction well.

***later***

M: Is it too late to say I love you?

T: It's early.